It's May. No idea why I'm remembering that day. Stupid thing...
It's kind of funny to be back in Waterloo. I have no idea what I'm doing. It doesn't feel like lectures are starting tomorrow at all. I feel a bit discoordinated. Wondering where everything is. Where everyone are. I dunno. Maybe it's cuz it's 2.22AM. Maybe I'm just tired. Feeling a little too shaky to be the start of the term...a little too subtle. Maybe it's just a term shift thing.
Monday, April 30, 2007
Monday, April 23, 2007
VPComm
Committee. It took so long to decide to run, through a rough but reflective time, just to be told by the fellowship I didn't get it. Even so, I didn't even have enough time to work through all that before I was told I'm appointed. Communications. Somehow, I got all the reflections, disappointment and excitement (well. I suppose I should be excited. Haa...) of it all.
I dunno. Next term still seems a bit far, even though this time next week, I would be getting ready for my first day of lectures of my 2B term. London, just a memory. All the challenges of school and committee waiting for me. Have alot of mixed feelings. Future is always uncertain. I am always dreaming for more. Maybe more thoughts will come later. Haa...
I dunno. Next term still seems a bit far, even though this time next week, I would be getting ready for my first day of lectures of my 2B term. London, just a memory. All the challenges of school and committee waiting for me. Have alot of mixed feelings. Future is always uncertain. I am always dreaming for more. Maybe more thoughts will come later. Haa...
Last P&R
Sometimes it's good to hear some stuff, even if I know it already. Today, I find myself staring into the P&R scene, not really wanting to join into a group and just chat like we always do. I was just...sitting there and watching. Taking in my last P&R session of the term...maybe ever. It's slowly hitting me that I'm leaving London...but no real insight or reflections today...
Heard a sharing today...heard a few sharings today actually, that I had to give a nod too, because they're all lessons fresh in mind. Fairly tired, but I want to write something down before I forget them all...
I think, the lesson that stood out the most was ... letting God take care of the people...and that even when I'm not around (well...most of the time, even if I AM around, I can't do much)...that He'll be watching over them. I dunno. It's hard to trust...but I've been told that worrying is a useless state of mind. Can't remember why anymore... but yeah...trusting...
Heard a sharing today...heard a few sharings today actually, that I had to give a nod too, because they're all lessons fresh in mind. Fairly tired, but I want to write something down before I forget them all...
I think, the lesson that stood out the most was ... letting God take care of the people...and that even when I'm not around (well...most of the time, even if I AM around, I can't do much)...that He'll be watching over them. I dunno. It's hard to trust...but I've been told that worrying is a useless state of mind. Can't remember why anymore... but yeah...trusting...
Saturday, April 21, 2007
Walking
I think, returning to Waterloo this week served well to remind me where I am. As I slowly disengaged my "London" mode and shifted back into "Waterloo" mode...can't exactly say I'm excited to leave London and ACF, but I'm slightly more at peace.
So at Westcourt, right now, is a fully deployed Settlers + Seafarers + Cities and Knights board. It's massive. It would take a few hours to play. We left the board as it, intending on playing it again when we're all back in town next week. Maybe that's how I feel a little sometimes. It took at least 10 minutes to set up (seed sowing). Maybe more. Than we had to teach the people who didn't know how to play (supporting each other). By the time we're underway, we're 30 minutes late (uncertainity). We play a little, than some of us had to leave (calling and commitments). So we walk away, expecting the board to still be there when we're back (hope). That's CCF. To just be able to walk away from it for four month...and come back...sure, there will be some new faces. But many old ones. There will be some new challenges. But many old memories.
It was a clear night tonight, but the light pollution meant I could've seen only one star in the night sky. But that's alright, because that one star pointed straight to Him. And even if all I did was sit and watch that one star, it would've been worth it. And that was all I needed.
So at Westcourt, right now, is a fully deployed Settlers + Seafarers + Cities and Knights board. It's massive. It would take a few hours to play. We left the board as it, intending on playing it again when we're all back in town next week. Maybe that's how I feel a little sometimes. It took at least 10 minutes to set up (seed sowing). Maybe more. Than we had to teach the people who didn't know how to play (supporting each other). By the time we're underway, we're 30 minutes late (uncertainity). We play a little, than some of us had to leave (calling and commitments). So we walk away, expecting the board to still be there when we're back (hope). That's CCF. To just be able to walk away from it for four month...and come back...sure, there will be some new faces. But many old ones. There will be some new challenges. But many old memories.
It was a clear night tonight, but the light pollution meant I could've seen only one star in the night sky. But that's alright, because that one star pointed straight to Him. And even if all I did was sit and watch that one star, it would've been worth it. And that was all I needed.
Thursday, April 19, 2007
Term Reflection (W07)
So I was thinking how I should get a move on my term reflections...
I think, one of the little things I've come to enjoy greatly is Taylor Library. Not the library itself (cuz Weldon main floor feels so much cooler), but the space. Before exam session started, I'd find some ACFer there about 80% of the time. Sit down, do some chatting...spend 2 hours playing Trama Centre on Kas's DS (dang...I've actually considered getting one...)
Maybe I'll plunk down two things each. Trying to figure out everything I got out of this term is way too difficult...
Material things:
- Settlers! Oh man...I can't believe I never played this at Waterloo...I know they have it at Westcourt Thursday Games Nights...I hear they play Starcraft too XD. But anyways. Straightforward game. Lots of thinking. Cities & Knights...ahh...the Black-7 gg moment and lost half my hand and got my only city destroyed...oyy...or when Enoch built 5 roads just to cut Jeff off...or all the times they rip victory from someone's hand, just to have someone else win the next turn...lol. Good times.
- Personalized cup, which I got from MC Appreciations. It, with its random features (like the girl parade -_-)...but whenever I look at its front...the words "In Him Alone" reminds me of that song that, for some reason, I closely associate with P&R...In Christ Alone? I guess that's what the song is called. More on this later.
Quicks and personalities:
- Summit and TC sayings?! I haven't been saying "so delicious" lately, but "TOO EASY!" and saying things like how Enoch, Simon, Tim or Jeff would say it comes out once in a while. Well. At least I have something visible to bring back to Waterloo. Man...we need a Summit...lol. Start our own random shouting.
- Crying hand motion. Man. I've never done that before coming to ACF. Now I do it all the time. -_- I don't even know who I picked it up from ...
Ideas and concepts:
- Small groups and hanging out. It seems like such a simple thing. But how much do we do it? I think, maybe it's some weird CCF-Waterloo-JL thing, but I want to swing into deep conversations at every chance possible...but sometimes that's like trying to run before knowing how to walk. Deep conversations are good...but too much of anything (humanly) is a bad thing, and thus...well. That's why small groups and discussions like that is good, right? Sometimes we get a really good meaningful discussion. Sometimes we're just hanging out.
- Seed planting. I do random stuff sometimes. Sometimes I get to see the fruits of my labour. Sometimes I don't. As time goes on and I get older, I realize that more and more, I'll see less and less fruits. My targets become bigger. My dreams and goals becomes larger. Baking yields immedate results. People can eat it and tells me it's good (or too grainy...or too hard...or whatever). But the more I move into the realm of dealing with people, the "rewards" instantly flatlines. In my encouragement campaign (which I'm incredibly behind...22/40 and Lent is over already), the response rate isn't that high. Maybe people arin't reading the emails. Maybe they don't have time to respond. A few of them do, typically to say thanks for the email and how encouraged they are. But that's assuming they actually were encouraged, and wasn't just saying so because they felt they had to. Out of my 22 cases, there was only maybe 1 or 2 people I trusted in their feedback. lol...less than 10% confirmed sucess rate? Not too cool. But it's exactly this type of work we need to do. How much grads gets to see their froshes take on Exec? How much pastors get to see their sunday school kids minister on campus? It must be really cool to be someone who's been around and have seen people grow spiritually. But then...staying in one spot isn't a very university-student-ly thing to do. In two weeks time, ACF and CCF will be releasing a handful of grads to the real world. Well...that's just how it is. I only hope that the connections established does not just fade. Don't forget you have your second home to fall on, guys.
And so back to the Christ alone thing. When I first stepped onto London campus, I guess I was a bit hesitant. Didn't think much of ACF after the first meeting. *shrugs* I said. I left CCF for this?! But surely...His presence is here too...Something that I've seen in my 4 mth here (hmm. Has it been 4 month already? Dang...). And in coming here, I've connected with another part of the Body. Beyond all our common Asian (or Toronto, for some) roots, the one thing that truly unites us is our common stance in Him, and Him alone.
In Christ Alone by Keith Getty & Stuart Townend
In Christ alone my hope is found;
He is my light, my strength, my song;
This cornerstone, this solid ground,
Firm through the fiercest drought and storm.
What heights of love, what depths of peace,
When fears are stilled, when strivings cease!
My comforter, my all in all—
Here in the love of Christ I stand.
In Christ alone, Who took on flesh,
Fullness of God in helpless babe!
This gift of love and righteousness,
Scorned by the ones He came to save.
Till on that cross as Jesus died,
The wrath of God was satisfied;
For ev'ry sin on Him was laid—
Here in the death of Christ I live.
There in the ground His body lay,
Light of the world by darkness slain;
Then bursting forth in glorious day,
Up from the grave He rose again!
And as He stands in victory,
Sin's curse has lost its grip on me;
For I am His and He is mine—
Bought with the precious blood of Christ.
No guilt in life, no fear in death—
This is the pow'r of Christ in me;
From life's first cry to final breath,
Jesus commands my destiny.
No pow'r of hell, no scheme of man,
Can ever pluck me from His hand;
Till He returns or calls me home—
Here in the pow'r of Christ I'll stand.
I think, one of the little things I've come to enjoy greatly is Taylor Library. Not the library itself (cuz Weldon main floor feels so much cooler), but the space. Before exam session started, I'd find some ACFer there about 80% of the time. Sit down, do some chatting...spend 2 hours playing Trama Centre on Kas's DS (dang...I've actually considered getting one...)
Maybe I'll plunk down two things each. Trying to figure out everything I got out of this term is way too difficult...
Material things:
- Settlers! Oh man...I can't believe I never played this at Waterloo...I know they have it at Westcourt Thursday Games Nights...I hear they play Starcraft too XD. But anyways. Straightforward game. Lots of thinking. Cities & Knights...ahh...the Black-7 gg moment and lost half my hand and got my only city destroyed...oyy...or when Enoch built 5 roads just to cut Jeff off...or all the times they rip victory from someone's hand, just to have someone else win the next turn...lol. Good times.
- Personalized cup, which I got from MC Appreciations. It, with its random features (like the girl parade -_-)...but whenever I look at its front...the words "In Him Alone" reminds me of that song that, for some reason, I closely associate with P&R...In Christ Alone? I guess that's what the song is called. More on this later.
Quicks and personalities:
- Summit and TC sayings?! I haven't been saying "so delicious" lately, but "TOO EASY!" and saying things like how Enoch, Simon, Tim or Jeff would say it comes out once in a while. Well. At least I have something visible to bring back to Waterloo. Man...we need a Summit...lol. Start our own random shouting.
- Crying hand motion. Man. I've never done that before coming to ACF. Now I do it all the time. -_- I don't even know who I picked it up from ...
Ideas and concepts:
- Small groups and hanging out. It seems like such a simple thing. But how much do we do it? I think, maybe it's some weird CCF-Waterloo-JL thing, but I want to swing into deep conversations at every chance possible...but sometimes that's like trying to run before knowing how to walk. Deep conversations are good...but too much of anything (humanly) is a bad thing, and thus...well. That's why small groups and discussions like that is good, right? Sometimes we get a really good meaningful discussion. Sometimes we're just hanging out.
- Seed planting. I do random stuff sometimes. Sometimes I get to see the fruits of my labour. Sometimes I don't. As time goes on and I get older, I realize that more and more, I'll see less and less fruits. My targets become bigger. My dreams and goals becomes larger. Baking yields immedate results. People can eat it and tells me it's good (or too grainy...or too hard...or whatever). But the more I move into the realm of dealing with people, the "rewards" instantly flatlines. In my encouragement campaign (which I'm incredibly behind...22/40 and Lent is over already), the response rate isn't that high. Maybe people arin't reading the emails. Maybe they don't have time to respond. A few of them do, typically to say thanks for the email and how encouraged they are. But that's assuming they actually were encouraged, and wasn't just saying so because they felt they had to. Out of my 22 cases, there was only maybe 1 or 2 people I trusted in their feedback. lol...less than 10% confirmed sucess rate? Not too cool. But it's exactly this type of work we need to do. How much grads gets to see their froshes take on Exec? How much pastors get to see their sunday school kids minister on campus? It must be really cool to be someone who's been around and have seen people grow spiritually. But then...staying in one spot isn't a very university-student-ly thing to do. In two weeks time, ACF and CCF will be releasing a handful of grads to the real world. Well...that's just how it is. I only hope that the connections established does not just fade. Don't forget you have your second home to fall on, guys.
And so back to the Christ alone thing. When I first stepped onto London campus, I guess I was a bit hesitant. Didn't think much of ACF after the first meeting. *shrugs* I said. I left CCF for this?! But surely...His presence is here too...Something that I've seen in my 4 mth here (hmm. Has it been 4 month already? Dang...). And in coming here, I've connected with another part of the Body. Beyond all our common Asian (or Toronto, for some) roots, the one thing that truly unites us is our common stance in Him, and Him alone.
In Christ Alone by Keith Getty & Stuart Townend
In Christ alone my hope is found;
He is my light, my strength, my song;
This cornerstone, this solid ground,
Firm through the fiercest drought and storm.
What heights of love, what depths of peace,
When fears are stilled, when strivings cease!
My comforter, my all in all—
Here in the love of Christ I stand.
In Christ alone, Who took on flesh,
Fullness of God in helpless babe!
This gift of love and righteousness,
Scorned by the ones He came to save.
Till on that cross as Jesus died,
The wrath of God was satisfied;
For ev'ry sin on Him was laid—
Here in the death of Christ I live.
There in the ground His body lay,
Light of the world by darkness slain;
Then bursting forth in glorious day,
Up from the grave He rose again!
And as He stands in victory,
Sin's curse has lost its grip on me;
For I am His and He is mine—
Bought with the precious blood of Christ.
No guilt in life, no fear in death—
This is the pow'r of Christ in me;
From life's first cry to final breath,
Jesus commands my destiny.
No pow'r of hell, no scheme of man,
Can ever pluck me from His hand;
Till He returns or calls me home—
Here in the pow'r of Christ I'll stand.
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