What is Caring?

I've been spending a bit of time reflecting on the question of...What is caring? Seems like an important question for someone co-leading Caring Ministry to consider. What is caring indeed...

My 'What is Caring...' tag got a few responses (and an email! haha). A few references to Care Bears (which, amusing, has an ultimate attack of "Care Bear Stare"...), so I went an read through the Care Bear Wiki (yes, I did it. In the name of research!), and found nothing useful. A few other things I did get, however..

Caring is sharing

Hmm. When probed further, no one had specific details to offer. I thought about...sharing food? Sharing ideas? Sharing time? Sharing knowledge? Sharing movies? Sharing living space? Sharing burdens? Sharing resources? Sharing life? But...isn't that what community is? Just sharing things?

In my Social Psych textbook, research showed that two strangers has a higher tendency to like each other if they spent 45 minutes answering meaning questions like their stresses and worries about life...verses...45 minutes of casual small talk. It is also well-known that Mere Exposure effect and physical proximity increases the likelihood of people becoming friends. So by sharing stresses and burdens...as well as time and space...people make friends.  

Caring is about food

Haha. How Chinese. But I remember how people mentioned that one of the most caring thing they've felt is when they're included in CCF SLC food runs...or that time when people brought food to SJU...or how when we've got no ideas for a CCF unofficial program, we default to potlucks...or even the fact that I've probably washed more dishes at Westcourt then my own house. Or that the Turducken is still one of the more epic things I've participated in. CCF is all about food. 

Selflessness

This theme came up a few times, in conversations and in a sermon. Of how we can be so absorbed in our own stuff that we don't think about God (and associated things...such as serving, which includes caring for each other). Not saying that it's bad to be address one's own issues...we're still students. We need to think about careers and co-op. How to pay rent or feed ourselves. It becomes a matter of priorites. The story that Mikee cites says it much better then I can.

So...what is caring?

The most difficult aspect about tackling a ministry like this is...no two people care in the exact same way. I'd probably reference Five Love Languages here (an interest book, though I have no idea where my copy went). And so I can't teach someone how to care, because I really only know how to care my own way (which, tends to be a bit obtuse at times, in a very tactless kind of way. I'm very much a work-in-progress too =P). People provide and recieve care differently. 

Caring is the emotion you get when you know that something matters to you, and you act upon that emotion with utmost consideration for the individual or situation.

It is an emotion. An acknowledgement. A decision. An action. 

It is about you and so is personal. And the individual/situation, and so is an social interaction.

Praying

And so if it's difficult to teach...especially since one can't teach emotions or motivations...I was reminded a few times over the last few days: if lack of caring is because people don't know how, we can teach them. If they're unmotivated, or don't care, then it's out of our hands. As with all ministries, this is where faith comes in. That's always a lesson that needs constant re-learning.