Nexus'ed

Last week (actually, probably for the last 3 weeks), the tech world was focused on the release of a particular phone, the Nexus 5. I generally am not too focused on releases like this, but somewhere between general unhappiness at cell phone contract, my phone's likelihood to spontaneously combust crash, and the fact that tech nerds like myself just likes big numbers. After refreshing the inventory page hourly for 30 hours (minus sleep time, of course), Google allowed me to place an order.

Of course, Google doesn't have these phones right now. They're shipping in 3 weeks. They just released the website to placate people. But it worked. Much comparison has been made to the Google server crashes back for the Nexus 4 launch. All people wanted was to have their place in line. Instant relief, when I clicked on that Checkout button. I'm sure there's some bio-chem at work here. Dopamine and all that good stuff.

I'm not a big spender, and as I was reflecting after making the purchase, and the urgency to which I wanted to do this, I had to remind myself that it's just a phone. A nice, state-of-the-art phone with a mediocre camera and average battery life (rated 8.8 on Mobilesyrup review!), to which I've read half a dozens of reviews to, but still just a phone nevertheless. I was surprised at how strong my own consumeristic sentiment was, especially since I constantly use the excuse "grad student budget" to extract myself from making big/spontaneous purchases and live within means. For those 30 hours, I was reminded where my heart is. I remember laughing and shaking my head with disbelief when I heard about people lining up for hours for a gold iPhone 5S, but here I am, refreshing away, not any better.

Don't get me wrong. I was brought up with the mentality of "if you need something, buy it". I think people should buy technology that they'll be happy with. They should pour over reviews and make informed decisions. They should wait a few weeks to make sure the first batch of the product is actually decent. They should reflect on their purchases. I did that for my last laptop purchase. But at the end of the day, it's just a gadget.

A few weeks back, Grad Cell did a bible study on Matthew 6, so we have excerpts of this passage sticky-noted all over my house, so I've been reading it every time I brush my teeth. I don't consider myself materialistic, and whereas I like reading about technology, I've never been the type to line up to buy the latest-and-greatest. But the verse certainly struck home for me, now, especially with a defense as flimsy as "grad student funding".

“Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moths and vermin destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moths and vermin do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.

“The eye is the lamp of the body. If your eyes are healthy, your whole body will be full of light. But if your eyes are unhealthy, your whole body will be full of darkness. If then the light within you is darkness, how great is that darkness!

“No one can serve two masters. Either you will hate the one and love the other, or you will be devoted to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve both God and money.

- Matthew 6:19-24

Accumulation

Grad students in general complain a lot about grad school (see: PhD comics), but I think one undeniable fact about it is the accumulation of knowledge. I worked for a prof during one of my co-op terms, and he's now applying for a Canadian Research Chair, which is pretty cool. One of the requirements for the CRC is that he had to give a seminar on his target application, so I decided to drop in on the seminar.

Not that much of the seminar was that new to me. I've seen them either in his course that I took, or when I was co-op'ing. Certainly, having a stronger algorithms, machine learning and robotics background, I can appreciate the ideas and models more, and ended up talking to him at the end, pointing out different algorithms that is probably worth trying. Felt super weird, telling a prof that I've got some ideas for him to try.

I think a big part of growing up is that we don't see that we're growing up. I still refer to my parents as the "adults" and us as the "kids". PhD has been tough because really, my prof is training us to be her peer (never going to happen), and the responsibilities and expectations are gradually shifting to me. But that's what real life is like as well. A reminder to raise to the responsibilities and expectations set before us.

As a side note, sometimes I get asked what PhD is like. I've come to describe it as this:

• Undergrad - Your prof asks you a question...then he answers it
• Masters - Your prof asks you a question...then you answer it
• PhD - You prof looks at you. You ask yourself a question. Then you answer it

That, and I point them to PhD comics.