CCF - Caring Ministry

A few days ago, we had our first Caring Ministry meeting, our latest attempt to address an old CCF issue: people left out and upper-year burn out.

Sometimes, I think, it's really easy to want to give up on CCF. We've always got the same issues, stuck at the same place because of the same problems. Lack of consistency. Lack of manpower. Lack of initiatives. We've all had good ideas. We've all had powerful visions. Many have faded because...it's too big of an idea for one person. Too much effort. Not enough time. People say they're interested, they're concerned. Yet nothing really happens...even the vision of our new team...I've been concerned about leadership burnout and upper-year (non-frosh, non-grad) negliect since second year. Yet I never was able to do anything, even though many around me echoed the same thoughts. Thus nothing happened. I think, in som way, I'm kind of glad that this project has been started. The momentum is now there... haha. Caring. All I gotta do is connect people. This should be fun.

So why don't I just give up on CCF? I just wrote an email to a bunch of froshes, telling them that our first program is tomorrow and that they should come...but it'll be just as good if they found fellowship elsewhere. I could easily go attend some of these other fellowships we've got on campus. But then...if I abadoned my home just because the house got more cracks than I once remembered, what would that make me? What kind of messages am I sending to people? What kind of messages am I telling myself?

Yes, cliques have always been an issue. Leadership burnout. Newcomer negliect. CCF is far from perfect. But if my own upper-year mentors had given up on CCF 3 years ago, then many of us wouldn't be in CCF today. We wouldn't have taken up posts at Westcourt or McDougall. We wouldn't be studying in the SLC or playing Settlers till 6.30AM (okay I didn't do that...). We wouldn't have stories like KD cooking mishaps or how else I suck at cooking. We wouldn't have driven through 9 different cities to move three people in. I would've never known what Western ACF was. I wouldn't have known what Waterloo CCF was. I wouldn't have known what fellowship is.

This really isn't 3 years, gone and past. Trying to think of it more as...2 more years left to pay the favour forward. Passing on the torch. We haven't burned the campus down yet, have we? Whew...3B has begun.

Kickin habits

So I suffer from bleeding gums, which is aggravated when I brush my teeth. I'm pretty sure people have told me this before, but when you're brushing your teeth, you gotta brush it with the gran (just Google "toothbrushing". I found this doing that). After my dentist gave me a lecture last week, I attempted to adjust. I've been really good...until this morning, when I totally forgot and subconsciously lapsed back to my against-gran teethbrushing habits. Thus I started bleeding again. Fun.

I was just reminded recently that formed habits are hard to kick. Those who know me would know that I'm a rather indecisive person. I tell myself that I can skimp out on little decisions (who cares where we eat...), cuz I can make big decisions (MCAT, or no MCAT...). My tendency to say "Doesn't matter" when asked about little things sometimes flow into bigger decisions. Not being able communicate properly and giving up prematurely ("oh forget it. never mind") means that big things don't get across either.

Apparently, Joanna started a rumour that I like pink (I don't. Don't even think about it). It seemed to have caught on with a few people. When I mentioned that I can't believe people actually believe this, she replied with "rumours have a bit of truth in them" (...okay. No comments). People will believe what sounds like is believable; there is some aspect of "truth" in it. Decisiveness will not spring from indecisiveness. Something like that. Maybe that's why I'm starting to point out things more often. To mentioned little appreciations. To (trying) be more assertive. No regrets, right? Reminded that little things matter too...