Support Network

Since I had to give a speel about this the other day, I thought I might as well digitialize it and put it up, since postings will be sparse till...Dec 22. Then I can make my posts from Calgary =D anyways...

For myself, the need to build on a sturdy foundation is paramount. If you hit me the right way, in the right place, I'm down and out. And I recognize my own weakness well enough to say that I can't stand on my own. Ecclesiastes 4.7-12 is a very good segment. I believe that the concept of Friendship is a gift from God. We really arint strong enough to fight on our own. Really...there's too much temptations. Too much complications. Too much things to do, too much needs to meet. Too much places to go, too much barriers to overcome. And although theory states that if we give it all up to Him, we can pwn anything. But seriously...when we're in that state, how much of us is able to hold it all up to Him? I know I can't. And God realizes that.

So thus He gave us this concept to make up for that. Maybe friends are around to pick us up when we're down and make life more enjoyable (The author to Ecclesiastes seems to think so), to push, challenge and guide each other (Paul mentions something along this line, in Romans 15.1-2) and to forgive and rebuke (Jesus said this in Matthew 18.15). So friends are a great thing.

Yet...when Jesus sent out the disciples in Luke 10,he sent them out in twos. Ecclesiastes similarly mentions this unit of twos. A quick run through the Bible on "Friendship" returned me Job and his friends, and the famous David and Jonathan pair. Maybe I'm a bit biased here, but it seems to suggest that having tight and small...but caring and loyal friends...not the quantity, but the quality, right?

I think, still fresh enough out of 1B (even though offical cram session for my 2A starts today) to remember what it's like to have a large number of mentors. As they all move out to Toronto...or Vancouver...or Calgary...over time they've all left Waterloo, until the grads of 2006 were just another name in memory in the halls of the University of Waterloo. I think, in a way, this may be the greatest danger of having only a handful of dedicated friends. Events like graduation can move them far, far away. Yet, it's totally unreasonable for me to request for them to stay. Afterall, they've served their time here (sometimes it DOES feel that bad. lol), and they're called elsewhere. I have realized, that from these mentors, I must suck as much wisdom and knowledge and good habits I can from them before they leave. Then...when I'm in their place, all aged up in 3rd and 4th year, I gotta do the same. All about passing on the torch, eh?

But these friends of mine, they've left. Leaving me with one less a mentor, and one less of a close friend. In a situation where any strong gust of wind could blow down this still growing house of mine, I realize I can't really live in the past, you know? I have to forge other bonds, and keep pushing on. Afterall, other people need support networks too. It's almost like a muturalism relationship. Yay...

Whenever we're talking about relationship (which really, is what friendship is, no?), it comes with talk about the guarding of the heart (Proverbs 4.23). The heart, which sometimes represented emotions (and still do), and sometimes the person's will (to the Hebrews), it's definitely an important thing to protect the very essence of yourself. By letting people close to you, you're allowing them to influence your decisions and thoughts, emotions and processes (1 Cor 15.33)... Obviously, each relationship bond we form is a risk. It's never a fun thing to get backstabbed. Thus we have to be careful...selective...about who we share our heart with. This isn't a light issue! So a tight knit support network...

For some reason, I'm thinking of the Love passage in 1 Cor 13. I'm not exactly sure what type of love it refers to, but perhaps it could shed some light on what a close relationship...a good relationship...a worthy relationship look like. Patience. Kindness. Not self-seeking. Not jealous.

I think, I get really annoyed with...well. There's this song. "Mood Ring" by Relient K. The people who are described in that song. Being carefree can be a bad thing sometimes, and...well. Approaching this logically. If I had a set of people who I can keep in connection that knows about my current struggles, all I have to do is give them an update instead of the whole story. They will be able to suggest courses of actions that I'd likely undergo, instead of totally left-field solutions. True, it can take a long time to reach that degree of friendship with someone. But I'd definitely say it's worth it. And sometimes, friendships just happen you know? I have this friend who I am able to figure out how she is doing and how I can help her with her struggles within a 5 minute conversation. How to achieve that? Trust, I guess? Maybe this is an exceptional case, but for someone who recently walked out of a prayer meeting, with people who doesn't feel the need to hide their tears as they pray...I dunno. I'd think with tears, a lot of emotions is behind a handful of water droplets. To let people see these emotions...isn't that trust, as well? And if a frosh is comfortable enough to do that to a prayer meeting group...how about two people?

I'm remembering the Armour of God (Eph 6) passage. It is often pointed out that we're not provided with back armour. In our own, we have to defend against all sides. But if I can stand beside a brother I can trust, all I have to do is defend on two. And if another brother is on my other side, that's only two sides to guard. And if we extend this wall of people to inifity...all each person has to do is guard two other people. But as a result, everyone's sides and back (since if no one can get pass us, they can't attack us from behind, right?) are now protected...to guard each other's backs if there are only two...or to guard each other's sides if there are many...each effort is few...but together we can achieve alot.

Yet. However great the friend is, the eternal warning is the source of power. People are human too...and humans make mistakes. They err. They make the wrong suggestions and blame the wrong things. Look at Job's friends' explainations. It's important that we help each other up, but ultimately, it is the responsiblity to repoint back to Him. God is like the 120V AC coming in through the wall. We're just a lowly 9V DC battery. People will come and go...but God will provide.

"So, if you think you are standing firm, be careful that you don't fall! No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful: He will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, He will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it." - 1 Corinthians 10.12-13